Speed dating in Malaysia
Swipe, match, ghost, repeat – online dating has become a cycle we all recognise, whether we’re caught up in it ourselves or simply watching from the sidelines. As a fellow millennial immersed in a digital lifestyle, I wanted to move beyond the routine of swiping left and right and experience firsthand what speed dating in Malaysia is really about.
Curious to see whether it’s just for hopeless romantics chasing love at first sight or a refreshing way to connect with new people beyond the usual swiping culture, I signed up – not in search of love, but as an observer stepping into the world of talking to strangers in real life.
A trend that’s more than just finding “the one”
If there’s one good thing that the various lockdowns in Malaysia did, it was to remind us just how much we crave a good ol’ physical connection. Whether clinking glasses with your best mates or melting into bae’s arms after a long, draining week, those isolating years truly made us realise that the power of touch is everything.
Online dating didn’t just turn into a trend – it became a lifeline when we needed it most. So, it’s no shocker that in a world where we swipe before we speak, we’re all out here hoping that one message, one cheeky reply, could be the spark that changes our love lives forever.
Bumble, Tadao, Coffee Meets Bagel, and Tinder – dating apps became our digital playgrounds, letting us vibe and meet without actually meeting. Even so, nothing beats the thrill of locking eyes across the room, feeling the chemistry, the butterflies, and the undeniable pull of real-life attraction.
That’s exactly why speed dating is having a moment – bringing us back to old-school romance, where you get to see, feel, and experience the magic in person.
An event not just for those seeking love
With the rise of speed dating events in Klang Valley, signing up for one isn’t a Herculean task. Thanks to the recent Valentine’s Day celebrations, I stumbled upon Lonely Hearts by Take The Leap – a community dedicated to helping you find love and friendships meaningfully.
The event took place on 15th February 2025 at Curious Kitchen, Petaling Jaya. Walking in, I expected awkward small talk, forced chemistry, and possibly the need for a quick escape plan if I felt out of place or disconnected.
But it was nothing like that.
My immediate refreshing realisation is that – speed dating isn’t just for those seeking love. Rather, it’s a social networking goldmine, offering a buffet of individuals from all walks of life.
From young professionals looking to expand their social circles to singles scouting for potential partners, the space was filled with people simply open to making new connections.
During the introduction, participants were guided through the registration process before being briefed on the activities planned for the event. The first round kicked off with Bingo, where each participant had to cross out a box on their sheet if they found someone who had done the activity listed.
A simple yet effective icebreaker, this activity had participants scattering around to complete their Bingo sheets. Whether or not they managed to fill them, one thing was certain – they had already exchanged a word or two with strangers.
Next up was a challenge to find the missing word based on a character or action hero from a movie. For example, my card read Charlie’s, so I quickly figured out that I needed to find my Angel. Participants eagerly set off to locate their missing word, which ultimately paired them with someone of the opposite sex.
A few slow minutes later, I found my Angel – a rather pleasant guy with an impressive knack for mimicking. I was surprised at how naturally our conversation flowed, rather than feeling forced. That said, I had no real interest in pursuing the connection, and it’s safe to say the feeling was mutual.
After the activity ended, participants had the option to take part in two simultaneous activities.
One was a Jenga game, where groups of new friends came together to play while following instructions from the coordinators. Alternatively, participants could opt to join the speed dating sessions, engaging in conversations that just might lead them to their true love.
While observing participants take part in both activities – and having my fair share of experience in them, I realised I had already exchanged conversations about relationships, work, and health tips with people I had neither met nor known before.
It felt like an upgraded, in-person version of LinkedIn – but far more intimate. The face-to-face interaction was a refreshing change, making the experience far more engaging than connecting with someone online.
The perks of talking to strangers IRL
Texting someone you’ve matched with on an app can feel like pulling teeth. Conversations often fizzle out before they even begin. Sitting across from someone in real life, however, is a completely different experience.
Through my time at a speed dating event, I realised that body language, eye contact, and the sheer unpredictability of live conversation make for a far more exciting – and far less awkward – experience than a dry “Hey, how are you?” over text.
Plus, there’s no pressure to perform or present a perfectly curated version of yourself. It’s raw, unfiltered, and honestly, kind of exhilarating. That said, the key difference is that before walking into a speed dating event, it’s essential to know exactly why you’re there.
Some people attend speed dating in search of love, while others simply want to expand their social circles and make new friends. Neither is wrong, but being clear about your intentions can make the experience far more fulfilling.
If you’re looking for romance, it helps to have a rough idea of what you want in a partner – whether that’s certain physical traits, personality types, or shared values. This doesn’t mean you should be overly rigid, but having a mental picture of what attracts you can make your conversations more meaningful.
Likewise, if your goal is networking, knowing what kind of connections you’re seeking will guide your interactions and help you make the most of the opportunity. For example, it’s best to know if you’re looking for workout buddies or someone to Netflix and chill with on Friday nights.
Ditching dating apps to try speed dating
Attending the speed dating event, one thing that truly struck me was just how much people crave connection – whether it’s romance, friendship, or simply someone to share a conversation with.
You could see it in their eyes, hear it in their stories, and feel it in the way they leaned in when talking. At the heart of it all, we’re all just looking for someone who understands us – whether it’s a partner to cuddle with at night, a friend to pour our hearts out to, or simply a person who genuinely listens.
It’s no surprise that many are exhausted by the endless swiping, ghosting, and confusing situationships that have become the norm in online dating. Speed dating offers a refreshing alternative – a space where people show up with genuine intentions, where no one has to second-guess if the other person is actually interested.
It’s honest, straightforward, and, dare I say it – refreshing.
If you’re curious to learn more about speed dating or even want to try it for yourself, consider visiting Take The Leap’s official website, where you can explore the various events held throughout the year. It may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but it surely beats mindlessly swiping left and right in bed at 2am.
You might also find these reads interesting:
- I was in 2 toxic relationships and then found love in an LDR
- We asked Malaysians for their takes on love
Cover image adapted from: TheSmartLocal Malaysia
Photography by Yusintha.